Waiting for Godot

So, here I am. Three months and 9 days later. I've been waiting for a work permit in an EU country. The said time period 4-6 weeks. If you're really lucky the lady at the Consulate said you will have it in 4; if there are a few issues it can take up to 8 weeks. Fingers crossed I headed home; and waited. Waited some more. After 6 weeks of no response I sat about calling them up requesting updates, information on my visa/permit status. Each time a chirpy, albeit very helpful lady answered saying "I'll contact the said agency in said country and ask for a follow up and then I will get back to you my self." Two weeks later, I called again with the same response. Soon I was calling them more often than a jealous lover calls his sweetheart enquiring about their whereabouts.

As in Samuel Beckett's play "Waiting for Godot"; I too sat about waiting like the two men who were waiting expectantly for someone named Godot to arrive. In fact, while they referred to him as an acquaintance they didn't know who he was and most definitely would not have recognized him had he arrived. During their wait they busies themselves with various games, eating, drinking, contemplating suicide, exercising etc. They also contemplated killing themselves. The only difference between me and the only 2 men; Vladimir and Estragon. All three of us found ourselves keeping our selves busy "to hold the terrible silence at bay."

In my case the terrible silence is not knowing my status or position. I am stuck in a limbo. Not here nor there. Not in this country or the next. Neither am I gently free falling. I am in pain. Not knowing is pain. I need to vacate the home; landlord requires notice. I need to book a flight; the earlier you book the cheaper the ticket. I need to rent a place in the new country; not possible online as its better to see the area, locality and place in question before striking a deal. I am living life according to the Buddhist philosophy; I am living life in the now, in the present. Buying things on a daily basis and not a weekly or monthly one. For you never know when the call will come.

In the aforementioned play "Waiting for Godot" many interpretations are that the two men are waiting for God, or an epiphany or repentance before the day of judgement etc etc. However, I feel during this experience that "Godot is whatever it is in life that you are waiting for." My Godot currently is my work permit. Who knows tomorrow my Godot could take on an entirely different meaning. But till then Godot for me is that stamp in my passport.